Master with Cracked Fingers

So it look a little while but this was my second old kung fu Jackie Chan movie. However guess fucking what?! It's pretty much the exact same movie as the last one, the long title I'm refusing to type out that is actually shorter than my sentence of refusing to type it out. The only difference here is that instead of those bizarre subtitles that often didn't match what was really going on, we did a English dubbed voiceover. It does make the movie a lot more watchable I will say that.

With the subtitles, the movie actually became a lot more confusing. I remember not at all being able to talk about the story because I had no fucking clue what was going on. Here the story is much more clear, however there still isn't a whole lot to it. The strangest thing about this movie though, is while it's about 80% the same footage as the first Jackie Chan movie I watched, it has a lot of new scenes in there as well. In fact the first 10 minutes of the movie is completely different. So for a while there, I had no idea that I was watching the same movie. There is even a completely different ending sequence. After the scene where the other movie ended, it continues on for like another 10 minutes. I'm not sure where all these scenes came from, and I'm sure I could find out with maybe 2 minutes of research, but meh.

The voiceovers are definitely better than the subtitles in terms of understanding what the fuck is going on, however they are also better because they are just funnier. I forgot just how much fun a dubbed over movie can be. The voices clearly don't match the people who are speaking, and the lines are usually so overacted that it's just hilarious. This makes for a much better viewing overall.

I touched a little on the new ending earlier but I feel it's worth talking about in just a little more detail. I may have missed something, but it's my understanding that this movie features one of the greatest endings of all time. After Jackie fights two of the head villains and defeats them, this guy comes out, hands him this gigantic blue flag that had not been featured in the movie at all up until that point, gives it to Jackie and says "You've earned this Jackie!" Has he? I had no idea the stakes of this movie were winning an oversized blue flag. Jackie then swings this flag around while this very familiar triumphant music plays. Credits! Wow.

It's my belief that every single movie ever should end with the lead character being handed a well deserved huge blue flag and then proceeding to frantically wave it around until the credits roll. Picture how much better every movie would be with that ending. If Rocky had gotten it at the end of every Rocky movie. If Morgan Freeman had been given the blue flag at the end of Seven or Shawshank Redemption. Or if Optimus Prime got one in Transformers. Really you can take any ending from any movie, put the blue flag in there, and it becomes at least 10,000 times better automatically.

The movie itself, ending aside, is still pretty generic and not that interesting. The voiceovers and new scenes certainly do help to create a much more fluid and cohesive experience, but it doesnt completely save the movie. Although with that ending, I can't give it a failing mark. It has to at least pass.

5.5/10